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People of color are more likely to be victims of violence in the LGBT community, according to the National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs. "That it was just like, 'People are out there not only killing black guys, black men, but they're killing gay men. "They were so fearful of what would happen to me out in the world," Terrell said.
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Both were worried about Terrell's safety. His father thought it might just be a phase. She had something to ask him - even though she already knew the answer. She told Terrell to end the conversation. Denise, who was driving, could hear the boy saying Terrell had let him down. Terrell, then 16, was on his cellphone trying to explain to a boy why they hadn't met up.
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The truth emerged on a car ride to the supermarket. His mother considered the possibility he was gay but refused to accept it: "I didn't know anything about it," she said. Terrell started talking to boys on the phone. She made sure he had a ride to school, not wanting kids to taunt him on the bus. When Terrell turned 12, Denise began to realize he wasn't tough. He was gentle, quiet, creative. ‘I just started to accept him for who he was’ "I was expected to be strong, and that meant not crying, not sharing emotions," said Terrell, who now lives in North Philadelphia. Terrell's mother, a hospital supervisor, and father, who works for the city, taught him to be what they thought a young black man should be: Protector of the house. Still, he had kept the feelings to himself. He had realized he was gay in first grade, when he ogled the light brown eyes of the boy sitting next to him in class. Terrell assured her she was not at fault. "I kept wondering, 'Why? What did I do wrong?' " said Denise, 54, who raised Terrell and his two older sisters in South Philadelphia. Had she and her husband, Melvin, raised Terrell wrong? Had a man touched Terrell inappropriately and made him gay? Had someone failed to protect him? Strike Three, she tells him, is being gay.ĭenise still remembers how angry she felt when Terrell came out to her 11 years ago - not at him, but at herself. Terrell's mother, Denise, calls his race Strike One against him - something people will immediately use to stereotype him.
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The number of black Americans who identify as LGBT also grew at a slower rate than Asians, Hispanics, and whites between 20, according to Gallup. … You have to be strong."īlack Americans' approval of same-sex marriage has grown more slowly than that of any other racial group. In fact, last year was the first time more black Americans supported than opposed same-sex marriage - 48 percent for, 41 against, and 11 didn't know - in polling done by the nonprofit Public Religion Research Institute. "Being a black gay man," Terrell said, "it became you cannot be a sissy. Still, he claims these two identities equally, a seemingly paradoxical existence in a country where being gay can sometimes clash with expectations of being black. Women clutch their purses when standing next to him in elevators and on the street. Casual greetings usually come as a, "Wassup, brotha," and others tell the 27-year-old he speaks "so well," as though it's a surprise. Terrell Green is gay, but most people see him first as black.